Doubting Thomas

There's little else that moves me like music. Once in awhile I'll connect with a song on a deeper level than just the lyric can convey. Oftentimes I listen to the music and connect with the rhythm, melody and chord structure of song and never really hear what the lyrics say. I suppose that's the musician in me - not only do I appreciate the music itself, I'm always thinking about how the song was done.

And there's some songs that one day the lyrics will jump right out and grab me, even with a song I've listened to many times before.

I've had Nickel Creek's "Why Should the Fire Die" album for a year or so, and have listened to it many times - over 50 according to the play count in iTunes. Tonight after I finished practicing music for church, I was randomly finding songs to play along with. I decided to be done, and sat my guitar down, and thought I hit 'pause' on my keyboard, but must've hit 'next' because the track "Doubting Thomas" came on. Now I've liked this song for awhile, for its music, but the tonight the lyric grabbed me.

It hits me right I live, right now.

I'd post a video, but the only one I found on YouTube had horrible sound quality, so here's the lyric.

Doubting Thomas

What will be left when I've drawn my last breath,
Besides the folks I've met and the folks who know me,
Will I discover a soul saving love,
Or just the dirt above and below me,

I'm a doubting thomas,
I took a promise,
But I do not feel safe,
Oh me of little faith,

Sometimes I pray for a slap in the face,
Then I beg to be spared 'cause I'm a coward,
If there's a master of death I'll bet he's holding his breath,
As I show the blind and tell the deaf about his power,

I'm a doubting thomas,
I can't keep my promises,
'Cause i don't know what's safe,
oh me of little faith

Can I be used to help others find truth,
When I'm scared I'll find proof that its a lie,
Can I be lead down a trail dropping bread crumbs,
That prove I'm not ready to die,

Please give me time to decipher the signs,
Please forgive me for time that I've wasted,

I'm a doubting thomas,
I'll take your promise,
Though I know nothin's safe,
Oh me of little faith

(c) 2005 Sugar Hill Records